Zero’s PIPod

Well old friend, we’s back where I was born and you was made! Damn it feels good to be back in the dust, who’d thought I would ever say that, but home sure has a way of warming the heart. Hell yeah I liked the DEI, I love it, but it ain’t home ( though it’s a close second).
So lets see, LA and this here Jet Deployment, In my opinion everything takes a back seat to the fact that Al, Bud and Jack is all back among the living!!! Id try to explain the whole Al and Bud thing to ya, what with them being Al and Bud but that aren’t the Al and Bud we knew…yet, but it would make your tiny electric brain hurt. Jack, well she has a story there, she apparently meet some folk and came back with a offer they are calling plan W.
Ol Harry up and shot Lance and Nick, something to do with a Duel he was in and his Respect for Maddie being taken from him ( Don’t ask). Maddie BTW is a missing, we’s looking into that.
Seems that Knox poisoned a whole mess of Hive folk, so we’s aint to happy with them right now. Lance had a talk in LA and them folk are sending us some “props” for a “movie” so we can have a leg to stand on against them. My concern is, we’s just puttn this council in place and now we’s about to start fighting amongst us. LA wants to put the US back together, Im fine with that, but the fella that’s doing the talking is about the biggest Slimy headed Pilgrim you have ever seen, so we need to go into this eyes open.
I went to the Sudan, Nico got shot there…then again he’s been shot most places he goes to so that aint a exclusive club. Saddie Mae is with child, Rom’s in fact, so we need to hope it don’t try to claw its way out (

Now, I aint Stupid, I know what a Vacation is…and who’s to say that some of those long stay overs with the Oasis weren’t as close to a Vacation as you can get in the Dust, but I have to say the three day leave I spent in Bali was pretty near the best Vacation I ever had.
First off, It was me, Howe and Mouse, Mouse knows the layout of the land and Howe…well lets just say he could talk the devil outa damnation. We flew in to the local airfield about 4:00 am and Mouse mentioned they had great tailors in Bali so off Howe takes us, the sun ain’t even up and he’s got some poor old soul outa his bed, measuring us and making us uniforms. The old man says he can have them latter today and asked “where should I deliver them to?” Howe immediately turns to Mouse and asks for the best hotel “ The Wilhelmina” and off we go.
Mouse and I exchange smiles, its like we are riding a favorable wind as Howe storms The Wilhelmina’s front desk and hits them with a verbal Barage. We are told the place is booked, but after a few minutes of “You Lost my reservation?!” and “Is this how you treat officers fighting a war for your safety!!” we are given a suite…at a single room rate!!
To Howe’s credit, he don’t mind that Mouse is Queer one bit, and we soon mesh together like the Three damn Musketeers. We down a Breakfast the likes of which I ain’t ever had and then run off to the beach for awhile. Its nice, don’t get me wrong, but all folk do is sit there, near about had me wishing for the Jungle. I thought about the Jet Deployment, seeing the Crew again, LA don’t know whats coming that’s for damn sure. I’ll have to write Alice and ask her to make sure she keeps a eye on the the rough types to help them head off any “problems” that may pop up.
That afternoon we ate at a local market and Howe and Mouse went shopping, apparently Howe was buying gifts for his folks. We caught a film and then headed back to the Hotel for some Dinner and to get dressed for a night on the town.
Dress Blacks, that’s what they call our dress uniform, except it aint really black, just dark dark blue. The pants got this wide red stripe and the coats got four pockets, shinny buttons and this here high collar that aint to damn comfortable. I thought the thing was to damn tight and uncomfortable but Howe and Mouse said it looked fine. Mouse was in his whites complete with a chest full of ribbons. Dressed to the nines, we headed out on the town. We most have hit 6 clubs, all of them seemingly cut from the same mold. We hooked up with a couple more guys from the Regiment, Salvatore and Brice, and had a real good time.
About 2:00 am we headed back to the hotel, this time I was the sober one, a rule I ain’t to use to. After getting the kids to bed, I headed out to a Jazz club I had heard about, the “Bongo room” Like most good Jazz places they were swinging into the early morning. I went in and was at the bar nursing a drink…that’s when I saw her.
It was like I was in a dream or something, there a cross the smoke filled club, sitting at a table with her noise buried in a book, her long bangs bobbing ever so gently to the pounding of the Bass, was Sophie. The light was reflecting off her round glasses and to me she looked like a Angel. I watched her for a while, my head played back allot of pleasant memories, a lot of hot mornings and long showers. Part of me wanted to go over there so bad, but I fought that urge back. I swear she looked right at me once or twice, maybe it was the uniform, but she didn’t seem to notice me. At the end I sent her over a bottle of her favorite wine with a note “You Look Great. P.J.” and left before she got it.

Ok….so I didn’t sleep that night, but hell Im ok, yeah I was a little sad, but for some reason I can handle it. Mouse and Howe tell me “ That’s why you steer clear of Jazz clubs PJ, nothing good comes from jazz” and by the afternoon we are having a blast. The DEI has some fine looking women and I occupied my self with observing the species with Howe why Mouse played the critic.
Sunset in Bali, I can’t put that in words, its like nothing you aint ever seen, I had managed to break free of the Howe, Mouse tornado for a while and just sit. Orange, a color of Orange I ain’t never seen, reflecting off the water all pretty like…This was worth the price. I think back on my life here, the woman, the flying, the fighting, but that seems to be just the surface, beneath…I don’t know…Its like I got a chance to grow in ways that I couldn’t back home…Like maybe I am more easy with being me. I finally have to laugh at my damn self.
Howe got in a fight with some Dutch Navy boys at a club that night and maybe ( not that it could be proved) I got a few whacks in myself, and we barely escape the Shore Patrol and police. The rest of the night was a real knock down drag out party at a private home, the band smoked and the people ( mostly young rich Dutchies) really showed us a good time.
The morning of the Third day I dashed a Telegram off to Woodclifte and to my surprise received one my self. It instructed ( a nice way of saying your ordered) to report for JET deployment, orders to be sent in Transit. Howe and Mouse drove me to the Airport and we said our goodbyes, I told Howe to mind the shop and to keep himself out of the line of fire and off I went.

The Siege of the Firebase has ended,(38 days total) 20 days after Christmas and we have been at long last pulled out for rest. Months of fighting is now behind us and I can say that most of the boys have made it through. We struggled onto the Dakota at the airfield, burden with our rucksacks ( My sword strapped to mine) and flown off to Ambon.
We land and are greeted by Harker himself and some Dutch and ABDACOM brass. The boys make a good show, they look the part of disciplined killer, shadows of the jungle, the Elite of the Raiders as they stand to attention. Several of us are awarded medals and there is some hand shaking.
After the hoopla, Howe and I are taken away for debrief and the men driven to Quarters. The 135th is to be expanded, in fact some of the recruits have already arrived. The Raiders are to become a battalion of the new 135th Airborne Brigade. A Dutch Airborne group has already joined us. Captain Johnson is now a Major and I am to take one of the Companies to be a special Recon Company…Howe actually smiles when its announced that he is to go with me. “ Don’t worry Mister Howe…” I chide him “ we’ll have plenty of time to find a way to get you killed”.
Latter in our quarters, we stow our gear and for the first time in recent memory I pull on a uniform other then a Camo fatigues. I open my foot locker that has been stowed since the beginning of operation Punch in October. I hang my captured sword over my bunk and we chat with some of the other 135th officers that stop by to welcome back to the fold.

The next day we have a dress parade, I worry if my boys, fresh from the jungle, will be able to make the grade…but they turn out looking like soldiers. With a certain amount of pride Raider company passes in review, the men have a swagger that sets them apart from the rest, their chests have more ribbons, the berets sit with more “attitude”. I am proud.
I think back to Preston, and the parades we never had. I for some reason see the faces of all those boys on the dock, but It is not a sad thing…I remember them for who they were and not what happened to them…I cant explain it, but I am happy to be able to remember them and all the shenanigans we use to get in trouble for perpetrating all those years ago, fuelled by our 17 years of life.
After Parade we receive a pass, and I Immediately call Mouse. We talk for a hour, its great to hear his voice. He has some leave to and we agree to head toward Bali, I drag Howe along with me with “ Its your kinda place Howe, Rich Snobs, Beautiful women and glorious beaches”. It will be many of the boys first time out in the General Populace so we spend some time going over the does and don’t’s…I hammer it in that they “wear the uniform of the 135th, disgrace that, and you’ll answer to me” and off we go.
At the Air field we notice our Berets and Uniforms mark us as a bit of celebrities to the Civilians…and I have to say I am not above taking a free drink…or three.

Off to Bali.

A Letter from Rosie….

Man it even smells a little like her, a breath of home. I sit with my back against a tree, perspiration cascading down my face from the jungle heat smiling like a school boy. I rip it open. It ain’t long, pretty basic but it sends me back, man is that woman good a tuning the ol bed springs. The way she used to climb out of the bath and saunter across the room, that butt of hers swinging like a sexy pendulum. Hell, I still maintain she looks good even when shes just hanging around in a flannel shirt and Jeans.
I catch myself chuckling, I was thinking about the time my zipper got stuck ( Damn pants were 50 years old after all!) and she started to get annoyed because business was good that night. Damn if she didn’t pull a knife ( My knife at that) and cut them damn pants off. Man she ran the room, the minute she enters, all eyes on her, worth every penny when your alone with her. A damn good friend to, listens to near about everything you say.
Nick’s Sister!!! I laugh when I think on that, if Command knew I missed that bit of Intelligence they would put me to work cleaning latrines. I never even saw that a come’n, she don’t look like him at all…and vice versa.
I let my thoughts wonder a bit, that time I had her up on her dresser, legs up over my shoulders and were both laughing like fools having a hell of a time. How she always looks forward to a new place or a fresh Holla. She’s a hell of a friend, I sure am glad she is safe…

My smile fades as I turn to the body of the Dead insurgent laying across from me, his dead eyes looking at me, a Dark bloody slit in his throat where I cut it, held him until he died and quietly let him slide to the muddy jungle floor. He couldn’t have been more then 17…we had killed his entire guard post without a sound.
I wonder if he had a girl, If he had ever been with anyone in his young life. “ No Offense pal” I think “ Just part of the Job…Aint personal” I smell Rosie’s letter one more time, I notice that it is now blood smeared from the gore on my left hand…Beauty ruined by blood.

Still, It was nice to get a Letter from her.

Im going to the Jet Deployment in LA…That is providing I make it that long without dieing. I got my orders in the mail drop today along with some other stuff. Harry sent me a letter, its good to hear from him, and I had a note from Nick, I didn’t even know he could write!
We are to be pulled out towards the middle of January, I haven’t told the boys as I don’t want them to get into the habit of day counting but it looks like we’ll have some well earned down time.
I was released from the sick list, I still have a spell now and then but I don’t tell doc about them as he will sideline me again…hell If I benched everybody with a fever there wouldn’t be anyone left to fight.
We ran some ambushes the last two days, trying to clear out or at least push back the Surgie observation posts on the near buy hills. Sharp little fights, a few more Japs pop up but we come out on top in each fight. We have to get our selves some breathing space, have to be able to deploy with out them knowing when we take off or walk out.
In one fight we catch them napping, knife work, I hate knife work, I think of Rom and how he loves it, I just don’t have the belly for it but do it anyway. It’s a relief when the next day we catch a supply column in a waddie and blow it apart with grenades, carbines and tommy guns. One of the new kids fancies himself a hard Killer, he was going to finish off the Surgie wounded, I ended up beating the crap out of him. “ Why cant shouldn’t I” he says in his snide LA Chicano accent, after 5 minutes of me kicking the crap out of him I say “ Me saying no is enough….understand” I’ll explain why latter, but in the field I expect him to do what I say when I say and if it takes a well placed kick or a rifle butt to the head, then so be it.
The ambushes are a different type of war then our Recon work, we still keep our patrols out and have managed to earn a bit of a reputation with our boys as well as the enemy. As proud as I am of our work, I still can’t wait to get to LA.
I wrote Sophie yesterday, hell I know she won’t read it but I have to let her know I still think on her and the like. She’ll probably spit on it and send it flying into the trash but I have to do it. Besides the fever and being bone tired Im still ok, physically and in the head, righter then I have been in a good while…Hope it lasts.

One week lost…I can’t remember much of that week. We had just broke contact with a enemy patrol and I had split off to draw off any pursuers that may still be following. I hadn’t been feeling 100% but in no time I was shivering and sweat was poring form me. I remember trying to will myself on to the RP, my bowels kept empting, Then ….nothing.
One week latter, feeling like a baby, I woke up on the floor of a Native long house, weak as a baby. Apparently a hunting group had found me, our efforts with the Indigs really paid off because they carried my fat butt all the way back to their village and nursed me. The Chiefs Daughter Mae, a woman of legend in the tribe ( and not to hard to look at) was primarily responsible for the doctoring. She has a Magic about her, something to do with the spirits of the animals and the trees…all I know for sure is Im up and walking again.
I have to say it’s a little embarrassing walking around in Native clothes ( its like a damn skirt) and It was a relief to get my clothes back on ( scrubbed clean by Big Smile, that’s what a call her, she’s a young girl who helps Mae, she’s mischievous , smart as a whip and as Care free as the wind). I have spent 4 days getting some strength back, the time has been spent teaching the warriors about gun’s and the like and telling stories at night in the Long House ( through old Boha, a elder who actually speaks a little English), My stories about flying are their favorites and much in demand.
When It is time for me to leave, the Chief sends 4 warriors to escort me back to the base. I make gifts out of the entire contents of my rucksack and the people love it, I give Mae a piece of Parachute silk that I had in my pack and you might have thought Id given her a diamond the size of a fist. To the chief I gave a lighter and my Machete.

The walk home was Tough, I was still weak, but I made it, I nearly collapsed going through the gate. All my guys came down to greet me, I had risen from the dead, Howe was the gladdest to see me cause he had a mountain of paper work for me to sign. Doc put me on bed rest for a week so I have time to catch up on mail and the like. I make note to tell the Base commander and Howe about the Natives and how they helped me. How many days till LA? I still haven’t got my Leave.

Its like…a million degrees under the jungle canopy. We are huddled in between the roots of a massive tree, no air blows, I feel like I’m suffocating, I am soaked to the skin and it hasn’t rained in two days. The boys sleep, they are exhausted, but I can not, we had a close call last night, first, our own planes almost dropped bombs on us this morning and second…we had a hard time shaking the Surgie’s who came after us.
My ears are strained, a snake slithering 100 yards away sounds like a Avalanche, a leaf falling like the fall of a boulder. The Jungle seems to be trying to suffocate us, in retaliation for the war we bring.
I got a letter from Victor Garabaldi the other day. It was great to hear from that kid, for a ENY SOB he aint so bad. He is living in the PPOC now, he just might make it. He lost a eye in some trouble awhile back but lives with it well. I wonder how he would do out here, Don’t think he’d cut his hair, Lice be thick on that in no time. I think on Rom and how he’d do, he wouldn’t be bothered about Leeches, snakes or anything of the sort, but Rom’s strengths lye in killing…bloody work…and we aint necessarily about that, we kill with Radios and maps. I think about Nick…No way, Saying Yes Sir and the like aint him, he’ll do as he pleases when he pleases.
Not even thinking on women puts me at ease, I spend some time comparing Rosie to Woodclifte ( Its not a bad thing to imagine them both tusslin’ together”. Both are so different yet in some ways allot alike. Then I think of Sophie, oh Sophie, I wish you know how much I missed you, those round glasses of yours, those long bangs that your always pushing from your face, the way you looked in the morning when the sun came through the window and shone on your face. I am said, but not like before, I know I am not alone, I know I will live, I know there is a tomorrow…but I still miss her.
You get a little out of sorts living like we do, sort of Vegetarian Vampires if you will, our dawn is dusk and our dusk is Dawn…I keep sending Howe notes on how to handle things, Returning Teams are to be allotted 3 days of adjustment when they get back to base etc. My team will be out the longest, every additional day we can stay out allows our new teams time to train…gives our brothers a better chance and we are aware of this.
No letter from Mouse in a week, I wonder what he is up to. I still miss flying but I am at peace with that loss…But I miss Mouse. I sent him off a letter Yesterday to find out what he is up to.
I had a dream a few days ago, In the dream I wake up in a field of wheat, strech’n as far as the eye can see, I know its Nebraska, There is a farm and I know that its mine. Children run around and call to me, deep inside I know they are mine. My wife calls me in to supper…it is the perfect dream.

I had better get back to cleaning the rust off my Thompson ( My full time chore)

Night time in the Jungle and we are on the move, it is as if we are gliding through it, like a gentle breeze. It is harder to track at night, however we are not after single men or small groups, our targets leave big trails. Always vigilant, always trying to think two steps ahead.
By dawn we are at a Native village, they greet us warmly. We treat them well, and trade some generic items with them, trying to leave no indication that we were here, we explain to the head man that it may be bad for them if the “Surgies” find evidence that we were here, he smiles and laughs.
We sleep in the Long House as several girls fan us with palm leaves. Then at dusk we are back out deeper in the jungle. Most of the time our days are spent huddled between the roots of a giant tree on the jungle floor while one man keeps watch, but every now and then we get lucky and find a village.
At night the “Surgies” are bringing equipment and men a cross a small river via a ford, we hunker down and arrange a Mortar show for the next night and are rewarded for our efforts. We count 23 dead and a number of wounded, we also note that there appears to be a increasing number of “advisors” with these groups.
We are long gone before they can pick up our trail, double timing through the jungle, heading for our RP.
I am slightly feverish by the 4th night, I have been taking my Medicine but there is no telling what I have. I keep going, what else is there to do, and by day 6 I have sweated it out. We have our first supply drop and I give my self a minute to day dream ( A true luxury) I wonder what a nice bath would feel like with a fine curvy woman, I think on friends and the like but also on LA, I have put in papers to make it…I hope they ok it.

These Fortified Points are a wonder, Usually on a hill top, initially cleared by bombs. They consist of a Artillery battery ( 8 guns), a smattering of heavy mortar pits and bunkers. They are defended by a series of trenches and about a company of Dutch Marines. They usually have interlocking fields of fire with other bases so they can provide fire support to each other if attack, and they usually have a small airfield. They also provide services to the local inhabitants ( Major Harkers Idea) Locals can use the Medical facilities, trade food or crafts, allot of thought went into this.
We are given our own bunker ( I have my own room), Sandbags and corrugated tin but they have cots and are cool in comparison. We spend several days just recovering, getting patch up, cleaning weapons, shaving, hot showers and drawing new kit from the stores. The boys make fun of me ( Nicely, cause they know I’ll beat the tar out of them other wise) because I sew the holes in my old uniform and keep wearing it. That is the Dust in me, we can’t afford to be wasteful.
Heaven is dry feet, Dry Socks and a new hair cut. We read mail, write letters and begin to fill out a mountain of reports. My eye is drawn to the Japanese sword hanging on my wall and my mind wonders, it sure is a pretty sword, I think about the fight and chuckle…not out of humor…more out of relief, she was better then me, but not as experienced.
By the end of the Third day, Sgt Washington’s team has come in and are placed under my command. We help them get sorted out. Two of the men are serious malaria cases and a third has a bad case of the jungle rot, I gently almost fatherly chastise Washington, “See to your mens feet….make sure they take their medication” then I tell him “Good job Raider, go get cleaned up”. On the fourth day I have to be a little stern with the guys as the bunker is turning into a Kansas junk pile, “ You’s in the Army still” I shout as they all begin to square away their crap.

Major Harker arrives, he never stops moving, never stops talking, He is a whirlwind “ Apparently they were building up to take Borneo, we landed in the middle of a hornets nest” he fires off in his British accent. He says that I have 5 teams under me here. He wants 3 out, 2 in at all times, he also says I have been promoted.
First Lt, that’s feels kinda good. Sure I have to put up with more paper work, but Harker tells me he is sending Howe up to act as my Executive Officer, to run things here while Im in the field, That will be good.
Harker talks to me about the Natives, The insurgents aren’t to kind to them, they being zealots and all and the Natives having their own religion. He encourages me to reach out to them, use them for Intelligence gathering and the like. I know Kwan speaks their language and make some notes. Minutes latter he is off, and I am left to get things taken care of.
The Base commander and I, Major Sloot, talk about increasing our area, we plan out another sleeping bunker, a CP and equipment shack, we also dig some Fighting trenches and tie them into the hills defenses.
Howe arrives the next day, smiling and full of enthusiasm, he brings some men with him and we get everyone situated. We spend the day getting the new guys up to speed, Kwan and Washington giving them lectures while Howe and I sort out the CP. Howe is amazing, I say we need something and the next day it is there ( We just have to hide it in case the Base commander comes looking :o). I am worried about drainage, when the rains come we are going to get swamped, so Howe nabs a group of engineers and they build drains for us.
Howe is enthralled by my sword ( As was Harker) I believe I have obtained a certain amount of celebrity due to the fight with the Japs, not many people in these parts can say they have been in a gun battle, let alone a Hand to Hand fight with them since the truce. My team enjoys the reputation they have earned.
I spend the evening on the radio, and in Briefings, Washington and Howe are staying back with the some of the new guys, Sgt Ngyuen’s team and mine are out into the brush tomorrow night, when are 5th team arrives, Washington will go out, leaving Sanchez and the new team in reserve.
I write some letters tonight, I can’t turn my brain off, I even write to the New Orleans Government. I send Mouse a long letter and I write to Captain Johnson. I lay up awhile thinking of home.

It was a feeling that I had a million times before, the hairs on the back of my neck standing on edge, my brain screaming “ Something is not right”. 4 men stood like statues in the jungle, weapons at the ready, daring not to move…all on a single hand motion from me.
I strained my eyes as I slowly scanned the foliage before me…hoping beyond all hope that this wasn’t anything. Then I saw it…40 yards ahead, the slight glimpse of a reflection off the glass of a scope, I dove behind a tree as the snap of a Jap Arisaka started a symphony of noise. The shot had missed, but several Nambu LMG’s had opened up on us and the plop of the firing of knee mortars could be heard.
“Amscray!!!” I shouted…a not to clever code word meaning to fall back to a pre-arranged rendezvous point ( We set them every evening). Carbines blasted from behind as their sharp report mixed with the sound of the Mortar bombs going off. I thanked the powers to be that we had not wondered into their Ambush zone, that I had forced them to spring it while we were outside it…it would take a few seconds for them to adjust, and by that time my boys would have vanished into the brush.
To my left I saw a couple of Japs…Not Insurgents…moving a LMG in a attempt to flank us. Time stopped as I thought “ Wow! That’s the first Jap I had ever seen”, they were covered with leaves and foliage, their backs and their helmets looking like the sourounding landscape. I leveled my Thompson, a short burst “one thousand one” in my head and one of them dropped, the other reached for the fallen Machine Gun “ One thousand One” and he to was hit by a couple of rounds of 45 ACP.
A Mortar landed to my right, “Time to move old man” I started up, Tossing Two smoke grenades as I went and a Couple of frags…keep their heads down. I bolted into the jungle as a Mortar went off and slammed me to the ground. “Up! UP!” my brain Screamed as my body slowly complied. As I pulled myself up, I was just in time to see a Jap, running right at me, a Bayonet pointed right at my belly. With out thinking I parried the thrust with the barrel of my Thompson and swung the steel butt plate right into his jaw driving him down into the mud.
I fired a burst into the man and continued my flight. Old habits kicked in, I reached a stream and made it look like I was heading up it, then doubled back down. I covered tracks and left false clues. Several times I could see Japs silently moving through the shadows of the jungle. These guys were good, real good.
I kept up a frantic pace throughout most of the day, Two hours had passed without any sign of my pursuers, so I started towards the RP, to meet up with the boys. I was winding my way through a streambed when I got the shock of my life.
I had just turned to go around one of the huge towering trees of the jungle when I found my self face to face with a Jap…and a woman at that. She had on a officers uniform, her helmet tied in a intricate bow and covered with leaves, her face had been passive, without emotion, but her eyes widened in surprise when she saw me. Lightening fast she drew her Automatic pistol and started sending shots at me, one bullet ripped through my shirt and left a graze. Her pistol apparently jammed because in one fluid move, she drew out her Samurai sword and came at me. I fired a burst, or I had hoped to, but I had only two rounds left in my clip, I could hear the bolt lock open I could see as on of the rounds blew her helmet off, all in slow motion.
She was like a Banshee, totally unphased by the gunfire, it was all I could do to block her strike with my Thompson as her foot flew into my head and I went flying, me one way, my weapon the other. She leapt at me, sword held above her head. “She aint from Kansas” I thought as I dug my toe into the soil and kicked the black Borneo earth into her eyes. I tried to put a small tree between her and I as I went for my Colt, but to my amazement, with one cut, she brought it down. She followed the cut with a spinning kick aimed right for my …”Family Jewels”… Fortunately my instincts are rather fond of that portion of my body as I turned slightly to block it. “She’s better then you old man…but she aint seen what you seen” I thought as I struggled just to stay alive.
Suddenly I looked to her left, my eyes widened, she turned instinctively to see what I had saw…to late for her, I brought my Pistol smashing into her skull. She was lighter then I had imagined, her body slammed into the stream bank.
I was on her in a instant, I raised my pistol into the air and brought it down on her face, I could tell I had broken her nose if not cracked her skull, she was out cold…if not dieing, but my arm went back into the air bent on continuing its murderous path. Then I stopped it…I slowly climbed off her and studied her bloody face. “You should kill her” screamed one part of me, but I didn’t, she lay there helpless, she had tried to kill me, by all rights her life was mine for the taking…but I didn’t kill her. I thought “ She had been a pretty girl, she was better then me…I was lucky” no I wouldn’t kill her, I had won, good enough, I wiped the blood off my pistol and picked up my Thompson, Her people would be coming soon, drawn by the fire, I turned to run but stopped long enough to take her sword, I don’t know why, but it seemed the thing to do, then I ran into the jungle.

Each step I took after that was hard, my adrenlin was wearing off, lack of sleep was sapping my energy. It was dark when I meet up with the others, Kwan had taken a bullet in his right shoulder and Sgt Ramirez had some minor shrapnel in his face. None of the injuries were life threatening but in light of the events, I decided we should pull back to one of the fortified points to regroup and heal. As the boys admired my trophy we sit guard and tried to catch some sleep.
As I tried to catch a hours sleep before heading out, my mind raced over the events, I had let her live, was that the right thing to do? I didn’t feel bad about it, I didn’t think I had made the wrong choice, I just couldn’t believe that it was me who had let her live.